Every so often you hear about a story, whether on the nightly news or in the coffee shop that perks your attention because it is funny or just plain odd. Sometimes it is people in the news and occasionally it might be about an animal. Not long ago you may recall the moron convention in the eastern U.S. and during coffee break the keynote speaker went for a leisurely swim over Niagara Falls. Television cameras showed him miraculously crawling up onto the rocks unscathed, proving that God does look after the stupid also. The moron survived and now World Health Organization officials are reportedly concerned that he could still reproduce.

Before this story, there was the graphic account of entertainers in Las Vegas and a tiger that was either scared or simply tired of meat scraps for dinner. The story made headlines around the world when one of the tigers took one of them by the neck and carried him away to safety? I don't know about you, but I think that people who stick their head into the mouth of a tiger are just a backstroke away from Niagara Falls anyway.

Lately, a fascinating story has emerged from right here in Saskatchewan. It is a classic tale that pits man against beast. A battle of wits and survival between a great hunter and a mighty mule deer. The Associated Press hasn't picked it up yet but Bucky Spooner has scooped the exclusive true story.

Every hunter knows that hunting mule deer in southwest Saskatchewan is like shooting fish in a barrel it's a sure thing. What many take for granted is that mule deer are among the most tenacious of furry beasts, right up there with badgers and wolverines. Speaking from his hospital bed, our hunting buddy, who asked to remain anonymous, said he was never so scared in his life, “It was like I was a Gladiator getting pummeled in the Coliseum. This deer just kept coming at me. He was like the Terminator or Energizer Bunny with an attitude, except he was a mule deer of course.”

This was one tough deer. Hit fourteen times (another reason for anonymity) the deer fought back fearlessly. Finally, out of ammunition, our hunter had only one weapon left at his disposal and it meant hand to hoof combat with his hunting knife. But in a deft maneuver, the buck kicked hard and thrust the knife deep into the hunter's leg. Both adversaries now exhausted, could do nothing but lie on the ground bleeding, and trash-talk each other. Satisfied with a draw, the mule deer crawled off into the brush and the only other witness to the savage battle helped his pa back to the pickup and applied first aid. The wounded hunter apparently tried to buy his son's secrecy but according to the young lad, no money was necessary. Fear of embarrassment was enough.

The hunter still claims the deer tried to bushwhack him but his son, who missed the early stages of the battle, was unable to verify the statement. During the barrage of gunfire he dove under the pickup thinking that they were under attack from someone on the grassy knoll. By the time he crawled out, the ground fight was well underway and he arrived just as his pa fell back with the knife stuck in his leg. In a final statement, the hunter said, “The deer was psycho, I never provoked him at all. He came out of no where, like a ghost.” The mule deer was unavailable for comment. 

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